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Mission Istanbul Movie Review

Well, what should I say about this movie? Masterpiece.. one of a kind.. OK, enough of joking. Let’s get back to the serious mode.

So, the movie.. what is it about?

Well, it revolves around a journalist named Vikas Sagar (Zyed Khan) who is working for Indian news channel. He moves to Istanbul for 3 months to assist well established news channel Al-Johara. (They wanted to setup their roots in India)

So our hero, reaches Istanbul, there is meets our stylish anna Sunil Shetty aka Owais Husain, who tries to impress the audience with his chatur dimag alias super brainpower.. both guys exchange their history in less than 2 minutes.. anna speaks some polished British style English and again tries to impress the audience..

Now, they reach the office and meet the owner of the news channel.. Ghazni (Nikitan Dheer), Now, our Hero and the owner tries to impress the audience.. and bummer.. grr.. a song.. now the next day, our hero goes to Afghanistan for news coverage.. there they meet another hero (Hero had met him earlier too), now, the hero, anna and pure Hindi speaking Afghan Shabbir Alhuwalia, try to impress the audience with their English.. (back off.. back off.. haha I still remember that funny scene) and with some hero giri stunts..

Ok, I think it should be lot more quicker now.. Anna dies.. hero cries.. the new guy tries.. new guy? Eh.. yea, we have one more hero, Rizwan (Vivek Oberoi) who always tries to save our main lead hero by giving him warning messages..

Ok, so the hero gets to know that the main news channel chief is behind all these things and he needs to get into the 13th floor of that building, hack the systems and get data in his so called X Drive, which supposedly hacks into the machine, copies the data and spreads the virus in whole network..

So, the reporter turns as a Hacker.. he hacks the machine.. I am still wondering how did he manage to decrypt the system password LOL..

Okay, the chase begins.. the heroine who is crying in India returns to Istanbul to find the Hero.. dhishum dhishum.. guns.. bombs.. and they save India.. kiss each other and the movie is over.. haha

So, now the main part.. the bashing time aka the review..

First of all, what was in the Director’s mind while making this movie? Ok, did he want to make a movie or a sponsorship program for the news channel (Aaj Tak) and a cold drink (Moutain Dew). These guys crossed the limits this time… the movie’s tagline was same as Mountain Dew’s (Dar Ke Aage Jeet Hai). I mean, the whole thing was total crap.. the news reporter who always boasts stuff like exclusively on Aaj Tak, Terrorists show up the board saying “Only Aaj Tak reporter for interview” and all.. come’on guys, don’t you understand, it doesn’t work?

And what’s up with the George Bush part? Why was he needed? Just to waste time? And, I am still wondering why there was any need for the lead heroine? Why these guys always think that, the movie cannot be made without the heroine?  And, what’s up with Abhishek’s item number? Pathetic music + bad choreography + super bad clothing? And, clone of Osama Bin Landen? Did they want to show younger version of Osama? haha..

There are many things like this in movie but if I list them all, the page is never gonna end..

OKay, director bashing done.. now, actor bashing..

Zyed Khan – This guy seriously needs some acting lessons.. it really pisses me off when this guy opens his mouth.. he should simply keep it shut.. PERIOD

Vivek Oberoi – Better.. better than Zyed Khan but still can’t be called as an actor.

Sunil Shetty – He should seriously think about leaving his so called English.. he is bad at his accent.

Shreya Saran – She need to act in BETTER movies..

Rest – OK, I am not impressed..

Okay.. the music? Well, pathetic.. no more words.

So let me sum it up.. hmm.. wait.. some more important things which you might want to learn from this movie..

  • There is only one good channel.. Aaj Tak.. they get all exclusive stuff and every terrorist loves this channel.
  • Every reporter can fight like army men, they know how to handle the guns, they know how to kill those terrorists.
  • Every reporter knowing some computer can hack high end systems using X Drive and by “unlocking” the password.
  • Always keep Mountain Dew with you, it gives extra boost. And whenever you see bunch of guys coming with guns and all, just drink the Mountain Dew, crash the can and say “Dar Ke Aage Jeet Hai” loudly.. all those goons won’t be able to kill you.
  • You can use Windows Media Player to read out data from your pen drive… LOL
  • And the last.. this one is super cool. If you are a normal guy or reporter.. you are in a situation where your wife / girlfriend is with the goons, your hand are tied up.. just make your wife say.. “Go tiger.. get him” And the bad guy will be yours..

OK, that’s it guys… I hope you enjoyed the review.. I am sure you will understand whether to go for the movie or not.. haha

On the box office front.. well.. another Disaster..haha

3 Comments

  1. Just saw the movie for the heck of it. I was embarrassed by how badly the guards were trying to speak English while chasing Zayed Khan, not to mention four guards(cops) couldn’t use radio to call extra help. And as the lack of any logic allows, they tried to kill Zayed Khan + Vivek minutes after they said they need him alive. Perhaps the worst part was the flash drive hacking!

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